Silly-Billy Lily

Crap singer, appalling fashion designer and amateurish chat-show host Lily Allen has angered organisers of the Isle of Wight Festival by cancelling her appearance at the last minute for what all agree are unacceptable reasons.

In an interview with BBC 6 Music, promoter John Giddings said that she had been booked since November but has pulled out because, according to her spokesman, her album is behind schedule.

It is no secret that I am not an admirer of Ms Allen and her execrable music and have found some of her previous marketing techniques and her general attitude towards her young followers and devotees to be truly deplorable, but on this occasion I think she has outdone herself. Her actions are shabby and inglorious at best, immoral and sickening at worst.

When performers like Allen are booked for shows, it is the artist themselves that are being paid to appear, not the record that they are currently working on.

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