I was chatting to Walt, bassist with indie band The Babysitters yesterday. I have been trying to poach him for a few weeks now, using all my powers of manly seduction. I think Walt is a thoroughly agreeable chap and a very good musician – the kind of very good musician that would fit right into place in the Enormous line-up.
He has said before that he would love to join the band, but, apart from his duties with the Babysitters, he was telling me that his wife is due to give birth soon and that he would not really have the time or the energy to properly commit to Enormous. Stupid women. Stupid babies. What happened to rock ‘n’ roll?
Aside from his skills on the bass guitar, Walt is a clever and very witty man. I mentioned this to him during our conversation.
‘Yeah, bass players are traditionally regarded as being even dumber than drummers, aren’t they.’
‘That’s true, Walt,’ I told him. ‘And drummers, by definition, apart from being incredibly stupid, are also very, very annoying. All of them.’ I then remembered an old muso joke: ‘Hey, Walt, what did the bass player get on his IQ test?’
‘Tell me, Davy.’
‘Ha, ha.’ Then he outdid me. ‘Here’s one for you that demonstrates the point even better.’
‘Go on, then.’
‘Did you hear about the drummer who arrived at the gig only to discover he had locked his keys in his car? It took him an hour to get the bass player out.’